SWEET RELIEF

Holy bejeesus I am in fucking agony. My back has been hurting me for the last 3 days and has gotten progressively worse. Standing up hurts. Working out hurts. Holding my bag hurts. Cleaning the dishes hurts. SITTING ON MY ASS HURTS.

It is a constant pain around the middle of my back and just over to the right. It may be a knot, a muscle, I don't know, I just know it hurts a lot. It is becoming unbearable and I don't know what to dooooo. Will it just go away by itself? I have to work tomorrow and lying on my back on the floor (the only way I'm comfortable, seriously) is not really appropriate in such an environment. So helpppp and tell me what to do!

Acupuncture?

Hot rock therapy?

Cupping? As endorsed by Gwynnie P.

 

Old-fashioned massage?

Thai massage?

Wheat bag? Note: this one is available to me RIGHT NOW. Handy.