Tuesday, August 23, 2011

I want Ryan Gosling to save me

So, I have booked my flights for New York (yay!) and I am pretty excited. Despite the fact that I am a giant re-tard and am flying out ONE DAY before Halloween (Halloween in America! How fucking stupid can I get?!) and ONE WEEK before my birthday (seriously, just slap me next time you see me, maybe it’ll get some sense into me) I am still totally amped about this trip.

Even though I am a giant ning-nong. Did I mention I was an idiot?

Every day another special NYC-related thing occurs and it makes me happy. On Sunday, it was watching ‘Friends with Benefits’ in which Mila Kunis’ headhunter character attempts to ‘sell’ the city to Justin Timberlake. As if it needs selling, I know. It made me all jumpy and I felt like I was about to burst out of my skin with anticipatory tingles.

At work yesterday, it wasn’t so much NYC itself which had me excited but the lovely people in my life. I work in a childcare centre and when I told some of the parents I’m a bit closer to about my trip they were so enthusiastic and sweet that they promised to make sure to book me for a few babysitting jobs beforehand so that I could have some spare cash to spend. I mean...sweet, right?!

AND THEN today this happened (well, technically over the weekend, but I saw the video today):


Scuse the language but I can’t control my animalistic reactions to this creature.

Clearly, I need to do something crazy in New York so that my man can come save me. Then, quick smart, I need to handcuff him to me, ‘lose’ the key and lock that ass down. Make shit legal. Know what I’m saying? Yes man.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Here, have some eye candy so I can have your vote

So, if you are friends with me on facebook/follow me on twitter, you would be aware of the fact that I have entered myself in a competition this week and reeeeally want to win. I apologise for the recent spamming, but I just can’t hide my desperation. Especially as I have some pretty good competition now.

VOTE FOR ‘APHRODITE’ HERE (it seriously takes about two seconds): http://www.primped.com.au/win-stuff/giveaways/primped-posse

I am in the running to win the chance of being a published writer on primped.com.au which is a website devoted to all things beauty. Home of hundreds of how-to make up videos, blogs, etc. and my own personal haven. I would like nothing more to be a part of it all and for this, I need your votes. Pretty pretty please. With sugar on top. And a cherry. And hot fudge. And anything else that lights your fire. You will have my eternal appreciation and love. You look pretty today.

Of course, the judges also have a say once the voting comes to an end in September, but I figure that if I’m super far ahead of anybody else re: votes, they will have to acknowledge my inevitable rad-ness.

I’m hoping that if you ever read this blog you realize how perfect I am to be writing for a beauty and makeup site and composing product reviews. Not only because of my mad writing skillz but also because I care so much about this stuff.

Anyway, thanks for reading and to show just how truly thankful I am, I shall now bribe you with pictures of pretty people. It was just going to be one pic each of my current faves (Taylor Kitsch, single Alexander Skarsgaard…) but for the whole Andrew Garfield experience, I’ve included a lot more of him. I think it’s important for you to fully appreciate every aspect of his awesomeness. Not simply his heartbreaking good looks, but his perfectly floppy hair, what he (his ass) looks like in his Spidey outfit, the way he wears the shit out of a pair of jeans/suit, his wonderful gait, and how fine he looks mackin’ on Emma Stone. They are totally doing it.

Also, there is Ryan Gosling and a baby. Honestly, he’s just playing with us now. How is any straight girl/gay boy supposed to have any hope against what he throws at us. Oh my God. 

And just in case none of the above do it for you, here's a couple for you. Sofia Vergara and her awesome, awesome...brains:

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Never ending supply of...

Seriously, come on world, I've done this sort of blog before and my wish has still not been granted. What the hell?

Ughh anyway. I don’t know what is happening recently. All my beauty products are running out! I must have bought a whole tonne of stuff around the same time or something because everything is mostly empty. Imagine: me left with no makeup. Scary indeed.

I wish I could have an endless supply of the essentials, because seriously, that would save me so much money. Most of the important stuff I use is a bit exxy so I would prefer to like, never have to work up the courage to drop my hard-earned dollars on this stuff again.

OR I could just buy it all in New York! Winner!

Products I wish would never run out, ever, that I can’t live without:

NP Set Pre-Foundation Pore Perfecting Primer

Maybelline Falsies Volum' Express Mascara

NP Set Liquid Veil in Buenos Aires

Bobbi Brown lipsticks in Nectar and Uber Pink

Bloom Sheer Colour Cream in Coy - amaze!

Taupey shimmery eyeshadow preferably Estee Lauder

Bobbi Brown Shimmer Brick in Pink Quartz

La Ligne de Chanel eyeliner

Napoleon China Doll Foundation

Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Serum - BEST. EVER.

NARS lipstick in Love Devotion

Jo Malone EDP in Lotus Blossom and Water Lily

YSL Touche Eclat. Der.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

If only I could turn back tiiiime

So I’m reading Lainey’s blog this morning, as I do every weekday, and she made an illuminating point about Nicole Kidman. It’s sad that is so, so true:

“There is no art to saying someone looks like a pig. It’s not clever and it’s not original. There is, then, no intent here to snark on Nicole Kidman. The reason I’m saying she looks like a pig is because, well, she actually looks like a pig. She wasn’t, of course, born looking like a pig. She was born with lovely features. Lovely porcelain skin. Lovely eyes. A lovely nose. Her own lovely, thin lips.

Check out Nicole Kidman on the set of The Paperboy with Matthew McConaughey in New Orleans the other day. Without lighting, without makeup, look at how she’s f-cked with her face, look at all the work. Look at how all the work is working against itself to make her look worse. Look at how the fillers in her cheeks are pushing her eyes up and closer together, making them so beady. Look how that is affecting her nose, like a snout. And look how her lips, all three of them, injected so many times, squeeze around her teeth, so that they buck out front, an open mouth breather through the slop.”

And it got me thinking about how very, very beautiful she once was. For me, she was one of the greatest. Her natural beauty could rival Cate Blanchett’s. Post-divorce and post-Moulin Rouge she was downright heavenly. Can’t we go back to that?

Argh. Divine. I could pray at her feet. It made me so sad when she started messing with her shit. Why mess with perfection? Even sadder is how she can’t seem to stop. She’s going harder and more intense with the face stuff and I just want to shake her. What did SHE keep seeing in the mirror (which we all thought was not only fine, but truly amazing) that she thought needed work? To see her now is almost heartbreaking. I wish she could go back in time and correct her mistakes but would she even want to?

And now some pics that demonstrate what Lainey was talking and just how crappy she looks now, compared to then. Ahh. Silly woman.