Yonce all in his mouth like liquor...

I can't get this damn song out of my head. I don't want to get this damn song out of my head. I want to play Yonce all night and all day and most importantly, I want her to keep playing me. It is just so damn enjoyable.

Of course she's playing us with these amazing stunts like the 2014 BeyonceMAs but she does it so darn well that I'm happy to go along with it. She trotted out the BIC and I can't throw shade because it was endearing and sweet and all the good things. When she clapped and exclaimed 'Go mommy!' my dusty, cold, cavernous heart burst with joy and adoration and AWW. A few ovaries exploded, I'm sure. Blue Ivy Carter is adorable and I cannot wait until she is President of the Free World.

I don't even know what to say about Bey's performance of every song from her album that probably hasn't been said on the internet already. I mean DAMN. Why did anyone else even bother to show up?! (To revel in her glory, I guess?) Because nothing would have defeated me more as an artist than seeing Queen B SLAY like that. There are no words. We were just privileged to witness it.

Unfortunately, the video seems to have disappeared from the internet (did it fall off???) but as if you can even forget. Look at the pretty and remember:

I CAN'T EVEN.

And while we're on the topic, I'm happy to share my thoughts in a public forum about what is goin' down with this billion dollars on the elevator. I think it's coming. It's inevitable. The conscious uncoupling will arrive and it will be handled flawlessly and in Bey's own time. She started out as an ingenue she and Jay quickly became equals and it seemed insane to even picture them apart because they are so perfectly matched.

However.

The time has come where Yonce has outgrown him. He's played his part in her history and now she is more relevant and iconic than ever. It's inescapable. But she'll be fine and she'll let us know when it's happening. I've made peace with it in advance. And besides, they will both be there at BIC's Inauguration (possibly performing).

Honourable Mention

Haters gonna hate but I feel like more haters are letting it go and getting on board with Miley nowadays, as I've always predicted. Twerking had it's place and time and it achieved everything she wanted, resulting in her award for 'Wrecking Ball'. Miley knows when it's time to grow and how to make statements in diverse and interesting ways and I am so curious to see where this goes. And I think she looks great.

Dishonourable Mention

Bitch, how DARE. 

I don't care if it was meant as a positive homage or what, but Katy Perry is not, and will never be, Britney Spears, or even anywhere in the same realm. Before Yonce decided to take the universe and claim it as her own, the VMAs were Britney's and hers alone. So, so many of it's iconic moments we continue to relive today are due to her performances (snake around her shoulders for 'I'm a Slave 4 U', nude sequinned bodysuit, mackin' on with Madonna, etc.) that for Katy to try and hijack one of them…NO.

Never forget, Justin. This is where you came from. Britney made you.