Worst

The Golden Globes took place on Jan 16th and as you can imagine, I have a lot of thoughts. Mostly, they went along the lines of "WHAT? WHYYY?", "That person is drunk", "I want to sleep with that person", and "George Clooney, don't you know you don't need to have a lame-ass girlfriend to win these things? You're the Boss!"

But mostly I care about the clothes. Happily, THANKFULLY, there was NOT an overwhelming display of blush, nude, sparkly ballgown numbers around (though there was a lot of nudey peach, but that's more acceptable) but there also really wasn't much of anything really. I hope we can expect more from the Oscars because the Globes, in terms of outfits, were entirely underwhelming and the men impressed me much more than the women.

I've got a few blogs coming up, because if I write about all my feelings re: Globes in one post, it will go on forever and nobody will read it.

SO. We begin, of course, with worst dressed. This list sort of surprises/pains even me because so many of these beauteous creatures are usually on my Best Dressed List. And now they're not. Step up your game folks!

Worst Dressed

 

Oh, Amanda Peet. Did you wear this horrendous thing so that people would be talking about you again? Here's a hint: dress pretty and find a way to get me Jack and Jill on DVD and I'll talk about you then.

If you read my blog last week, you know my thoughts about Natalie Portman. And this disgusting, vile pink and red monstrosity has done nothing to assuage how I feel about her. PINK. AND. RED.

Ah, the first of the fishtail/mermaid gowns. This was a glaring trend last night and an awful one. You know me, I've always hated a fishtail. I don't think it suits ANYBODY, it's unflattering, it's weird and it looks like you can't walk. Too difficult. And not even The Body can make this silhouette work. Also it's just, like, an ugly dress.

I don't think Freida Pinto has ever made one of my Worsts lists, and yet, here she is. This makes me sad. The colour is kinda nice and the bodice fits well...that's about it really. The bottom part...well, it's unflattering at best.

Kate! Noooooooooo! I went back and forth with this one, but only after I saw this pic. During the red carpet and ceremony, I hated it. So I'm sticking with my original gut feeling. I'm thinking it didn't move very well? It looked like it didn't fit right, and yet, I quite like the top bit in this picture. Hmmm. Maybe it's just better stationary. That wasn't very helpful. Stoked she won though! ALSO: no Leo + Kate moment?! WTF?? THEY ARE BEST FRIENDS AND WE GET NOTHING?

The way I feel about Rooney Mara is akin to how I feel about Natalie Portman. However, Rooney is more open about the fact that she is a cunt (refers to herself as 'aloof', bitches about all her previous acting jobs which apparently were unworthy of her extreme talent, etc.) so I guess we give her props for that. She also, apparently, finds it beneath her to smile/show appreciation for being nominated/acknowledge what an honour this is for an actor or actress/demonstrate any form of humility/act like a decent human being. Take some lessons from Jessica Chastain, bitch.
                                                      

HEY YOU GUYS, DID YOU KNOW THAT JESSICA BIEL IS GETTING MARRIED THIS YEAR? She turned up in a wedding dress, so I'm guessing that's why she was there? To remind us? That she gets to marry a loser cheater and be his #1 girl. Which he is finally cool with, coz she'll let him get his on the side, as long as she gets to be his bona fide? Ugh. Her career certainly isn't adequate enough reason to let her present "Best Television Series for a Comedy or Musical". Also, Leighton did it better last year, in Burberry.

Sigh, another painful one. Kristen Wiig I LOVE your ass, and I so, so wanted 'Bridesmaids' to win (you were robbed) and yet when you turn up like this, you give me no choice (I love commas!). There's no colour! Your hair is so dark and monochrome! I like your necklace though. And that you're currently banging Fabrizio Moretti from The Srokes. But mostly, I like how you used to look before you figured you had to 'grow up' or something.

Haha. Hahahahaha. Not only is this a butt-ugly dress, but Lea Michele actually looks like she's in pain, trying to contort herself into those positions. Have you seen her try to do it on film? She's become renowned for it now and people mock her...yet, she doesn't stop. Does she think she looks good? Does she think people admire her fierce contortions? Gurl, relax, we just want to shake you out.

Durrr. This is effing disgusting. I will give Madge props though for her new new face. It looks great, much better than her old new face.

I know. I KNOW. It's Meryl Streep. Who gives a shit what list she is on, she is above petty lists by pathetic anonymous bloggers, and yet...she was nominated. She was one of the frontrunners. What the hell? She usually turns it out when she thinks she has a chance of winning. I don't know.

Another one not usually on my Worst list! Sad, saggy blah black dress? Boring makeup? She was very, very 'meh' all evening, even in her interviews. Perk up, ladypants, you can't always be in a hugely nominated film! You take what you can!

Why is, Kelly Osbourne? Shit, I hate her. How dare she be allowed to provide commentary on other people's fashions when she turns up looking like this, and worse. Joan Rivers may be a kook but at least she's funny! Giuliana may not always be stunning but at least she's likeable! All Kelly does is point out when other women look fat and pat herself on the back for losing weight. Also, her hair is purple. Far out. I can't even...

So, Dianna Agron is a figure skater now? If Rachel McAdams only just barely pulled off her version (in context: Cannes, and she was the star of the premiere), Dianna should be slaughtered for even trying.

Oh. Piper Perabo. I don't even...I just...nope, I don't have anything. I just can't with this.

Reese Witherspoon is trying to be sexy now, did you know? Good for her, but 'sexy' ain't her bag. Beautiful, yes. Elegant, definitely. Sexy? Hellz no. On top of the fact that it was red (on the red carpet...) and it was a fishtail gown, it didn't fit right. It looked tight and bunched-up around her middle and reaaally precariously loose on her boobies. You can kind of see it in the second pic, but watching footage of her...I was worried we were gonna see the girls. Plus her hair just looks messy. Reese looks better sleek.

This one kpisses me off the most. Of all the people in Hollywood, Salma Hayek has no excuse. With her connections (her husband Francois-Henri Pinault is the CEO of a company that owns YSL, Gucci and Balenciaga to name a few) she should be wearing something amazing, not this disgusting shiny thing. Oh my God.

Tinaaaa!!!! Nooooooooo! I almost put this on the Best list, just because of Tina, but I really can't. It's a (voluminous!) fishtail, it's ruched in places it shouldn't be...eek. I WILL give her snaps for colour and a stunning, stunning face though. Her hair and makeup are divine. I'm sorry Tina. I love you. Always. Oh geez, I'm starting to sweat and my hands are shaking...I should put this in the best column, shouldn't I?! I LOVE YOUU <3

Zooey, not so much. I think she has finally moved herself from the 'cute and a little bit quirky' to just 'plain annoying' column. A lot of pictures in my Google search were of her doing stupid cutesy poses like that. Also, her 'custom' Prada dress fit badly and looked like it was about three different outfits in one. I like Emily better now! See how genuine and adorbs she looks?! OH AND look at the hideous sideburn type things happening with Zooey's hair!!! What IS that?!

Worst Boys

Adam Levine is SUCH a douchebag, I know this, and yet still he surprises me. I intensely dislike him. Also, he was incredibly, incredibly rude to Giuliana Rancic during his interview and she remained so charming and professional and sweet and I just wanted to punch him. Dude, why were you even there?! Shut your damn mouth with your goddamn attitude and refusal to answer questions - what the hell else was Giuliana supposed to ask you about (seeing as though you pretty much have no reason to be there)??? Ugh, sit DOWN Adam Levine. Props to Giuliana though, the consummate professional. Who, by the way, is battling breast cancer and a double mastectomy and would probably much rather be doing other things than interview your ungrateful, sanctominous ass so show some goddamn respect ADAM.

Duh. The douchiest of douchey douchebags. Such a vile sleaze and yet this twat gets celebrated and rewarded every day in Hollywood (I'm talking about his paycheck and being asked to present an award). Blegh.

Gerard Butler. I don't get it ladies/some gentlemen. Really? This scruffy, spitty, sleazebag? REALLY? I mean, sure I cried in 'P.S. I love you' but...really? Yes? This is a sexy dream guy for so many of you? I give up.

Stay tuned for my Best list + what I think were the most memorable moments.

Everyday no makeup makeup

A dear friend of mine was left incredulous after one of my recent makeup posts where I claimed to use about a bazillion products "literally every day" and to be honest, I don't think she believed that I did actually use them. In fact, I think a lot of people who see me on a daily basis would not believe how many products I have on my face.

So to appease Bel, today I am going to outline my daily makeup routine + the slight variations of the same look that get me through almost every occasion.

The base I always, always start with. ALWAYS.

Skin:

- First and foremost, eye cream. I have terrible dark circles so I use eyecream every morning and night to rehydrate. Wait for a few minutes before you do anything else to let it do it's job.
- I then apply a pore minimizer to give me a nice smooth base before I apply any makeup. I quite enjoy Estee Lauder's Idealist Pore Minimizing Skin Refinisher. You only need like 3 drops for the whole face.
- Moisturiser. Derrr. My skin is incredibly dry so I heart First Aid Beauty Ultra Repair Cream.
- Depending on if I'm going to need my makeup to stay on for a while, or if I'm going to a special event, I would apply primer here, as it makes your slap stay put for ages. NP Set works for me.
- Depending on if it's a day/night look, I then apply tinted moisturiser or foundation. Tinted moisturiser for the middle of summer, sheer foundation like Chanel Vitalumiere Aqua or Napoleon's Sheer Genius for day and for more full coverage I go for Napoleon's China Doll foundation.
- FINALLY I finish off my base with concealer. Ever since discovering the magic of a concealer that matches my foundation and is not almost white I've never been happier. One needs so much less foundation if one has a great concealer. Benefit's Boi-ing concealer is the greatest as it works wonders on blemishes and pimples but can also be creamy enough (if you warm it on your fingers) to use on the delicate under-eye area.

Eyes:
- I start with an eye primer that's the same as my skin tone (Laura Mercier's Eye Basics in wheat). Even if I'm not wearing eye shadow that day, I still use this product. It evens out the skin tone on the eyelid, hides capillaries, whatever. It's genius.
- And if I DO decide to wear eye shadow, the previous step acts as the perfect base to keep it all in place and prevent creasing. Which brings me to Clinique's lid smoothies! These are cream eye shadows which I then apply over the top of the primer. Cashew Later is a beautiful, magic, divine almost non-colour that makes you look all wide-awake and refreshed and opens up those peepers. Nice.
- I then line my lower waterline (you know, inside the bottom lashes) with Benefit's Eye Bright eyeliner. A fleshy-coloured eyeliner that also aids me in my mission to look awake as it helps counteract redness. More flattering than stark white.
- Mascara obviously is the finishing touch. Brown if I'm going for a really 'natural' look and black if I want full, thick lashes (Maybelline Volum' Express Falsies).

So that is my default preparation, every day. It takes me about 5 minutes. Then I just add any of these variations depending on my mood:
- Peach creme blush on the apples of my cheeks + peachy lip balm/lipstick.
- Stain on my cheeks and lips in either pink (Benefit's Posietint) or coral (Benefit's Cha Cha Tint) + Burt's Bees lip balm.
- Bronzer applied on the high points of the face for an all-over 'sunkissed' look. But a lot of people can't tell when I'm 'bronzed' because I just look like other peoples 'normal alive colour'.
- If I need a little glowy-ness I also add some illuminator. Benefit Watts Up is my fave at the moment because it's a stick so it's really easy + quick to apply with no streakiness and makes you look all golden. Prettttty.
- Will often also press a little powder eyeshadow on top of the cream shadow in a taupey-latte colour. It not only sets it for hours but makes you look a little more 'done' without being over the top made up.

And then I look a little something like this!:

It all looks so effortless. LIKE I'M NOT EVEN WEARING ANYTHING. Oh my god. I know you're wondering if it's even worth it...but trust me it is an improvement on what I'm working with.

Come clean Natalie Portman

Let me preface this by acknowledging that yes, I know this is a petty mean-spirited post. However, for the past 16 years or so, I've spent most of my free time reading trash magazines and more recently, gossip blogs. It's what I do, it's what I know, it's what I have opinions about. These are the issues that matter to me. And highlighting what a douchebag I think Natalie Portman is fits into that. Deal.

I'm not going to lie, I, like many others was once enamoured with Natalie Portman. I thought she was adorable and cute and funny and a decent actress (my favourite quote from 'Garden State': "Are you actually retarded?" Sigh. Such perfect delivery). In hindsight, I cringe at the thought that she duped me too.

She still has many, many loyal supporters and guys LOVE her, but I feel like I've become more aware (through watching her Oscars campaign, reading her interviews, seeing pap shots, reading articles about her etc not actually knowing her - I'm aware of this) of what she's really like and I want to slap her sanctimonious douchey face.

But before I get too violent, let's start with when she first began annoying me. Other than taking herself super seriously (she is in fact renowned for being pretty bitchy in Hollywood Lalaland), her Oscars campaign flipped the switch into full-blown irritating as HELL. Sometimes I wonder if she became pregnant on purpose, to secure an Oscar win. However now I have other theories about her pregnancy that sort of disprove this. But I wouldn't have put it past her. And if you seriously doubt she was campaigning at all, she was, hard and it was in the most annoying way possible. Stay tuned for her Globes appearance.

Aside from the ATROCIOUS fashions she wore during awards season (that satin Victor and Rolf sheet, secured with a red glittery flower? The french twist? vom vom vom) it was her sugary, sweet-as-pie, gag-inducing, holier-than-thou attitude that really did it for me.

Uuuuuuugh. Did you see the way she gazed at that ballerina fool through her lashes? The smug little wanky smile? I feel like nothing about her is genuine. From the second they read her name, she put on a sickeningly beautiful performance. I'm sure many, many people ate this up. I felt sick. "Continuing this creation of bringing more life..." oh my god. Stop. Interviews she did during this time were just as bad. Think quotes such as "I have been swimming every day. When I am in my womb-like environment, I am hoping the baby is feeling peaceful" and "I told Darren Aronofsky, I was like, 'First you got me skinny, and now you're getting me fat,' because he introduced me to my fiance. It's the greatest gift he ever gave me." Ah, plot-foreshadowing, dontcha love it?

Her Oscars speech wasn't as bad, but she still managed to annoy the living daylights out of me. After campaigning so hard, Natalie knew she had this in the bag. She was so sure in fact, she didn't even pretend to act surprised when they read her name. See that smile? That girl has 'entitled' written all over her perfectly gorgeous face. Ugh. Annette Bening for the win.

You probably think I'm being harsh on her. But before 'Black Swan' Portman was snarky, she had an attitude, she was known for how private she liked to be, girl kept her shit locked down. Her bitchface is brilliant. (N.B. I know she is already pregnant in this shot, but this is my favourite favourite bitchface of hers from ever) And then post-nomination, she gets pregnant and she's all about gushing about her private life. Gurl, please.

Anyway. So that was just a little insight into why Natalie Portman annoys me. Not a big deal. I just wanted to demonstrate why I felt so irritated by her. Her campaign didn'y fly with me.

However, in addition to simply making me gag with her 'creating creation' bullshit speech, she also talks about meeting her fiance on the set of 'Black Swan'. Who was in a long-term relationship when he met her. This shady dude is a grade-A douche which you can read about here: http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/19180/The-Smutty-World-of-Benjamin-Ballet. His shady past probably helps to explain why he has agreed to marry her and act as her baby daddy. I think he's a money-hungry famewhore and has thus agreed to be Mr. Portman. Probably not a big deal you're thinking, raising the kid, as he does in fact appear to be the father.

But this blind item made me (and most of the internet) think otherwise:
When this famous director dropped out of a high-profile project, there was some speculation that it was due to personal rather than professional reasons. He had broken up with an actress last year, and it was believed that each was taking time off from work to battle over the custody of their child/ren. What isn’t public knowledge is that their breakup was due in large part to his affair with another actress… who became pregnant with his baby. The jury is still out on whether or not any of the three will ever acknowledge the affair and/or the baby's paternity.

Read more at ONTD: http://ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.com/58682049.html#ixzz1j6tnUNzy

The verdict appears to be that Darren Aronofsky is the famous director, the high profile project that was dropped was 'Wolverine', the actress he had broken up with was Rachel Weisz (who may have conducted her own little affair with Daniel Craig) and the custody battle was over their child, Henry. The other actress, is, obviously Natalie Portman...who became pregnant with his baby.

It kills me that this wide-eyed angelic princess used her pregnancy to win an Oscar, after (allegedly) breaking up a marriage to do so. Allegedly. But let's take a look at the pics shall we?

As IF this isn't the real baby daddy:

PHEW. End rant. Fluffy makeup blog to come later in the week.

CHRISTMAS PRESENTS

AM I TOO LATE? Gosh, I hope not. This is my Xmas wishlist, please feel free to get me any or all of these things, I don't even care if it's a belated prezzie (my fault for not telling you in time, I know).

Anyway, here goes. Things I would quite like to receive on Sunday include but are not limited to:

A nice pen. I've been using shitty Papermate ones for the last 5 years (poor uni student) and I think if I get a real proper pen I will seem more like an adult. Also, maybe then I won't need to use ten million crappy cheap pens a week.

A Bobbi Brown bronzer brush. I've been using a sub-par cheap bronzer brush for a while now, because bronzer was never a huge part of my life, but I'm starting to realise the brush would make such a significant difference to the application. And BB always has the best brushes.

Gift vouchers! I loooove buying stuff myself, so if you ever worry that buying someone a gift voucher is impersonal and tacky THINK AGAIN. Gift vouchers are the shit. They're like play money! And you can get whatever you want! No false enthusiasm here. I would specifically like a JB Hi Fi one as there is a shit-tonne of dvd-buying I need to do. I actually think I might be getting this gift. If my mum has not picked up on the hints by now, well, we have bigger issues to worry about then.

Jewelleryyyyy! (OR, failing that, you know, maybe a specific jewellery-buying person would be nice too?) I have been on the hunt for a pretty, girly simple gold ring for a while now and I still haven't committed to anything. To go with the girly, delicate ring I'm also thinking a girly, delicate bracelet might be nice? And some PLAIN, SIMPLE, TINY gold studs. Jesus ass-balls these have been hard to find. Some inspiration:

Monica Vader

Made her Think (but in gold)

Daisy Knights (ditto)

Elizabeth and James

Ginette NY

Gorjana

Tom Binns (ok, not really fitting in with the theme BUT THEY'RE AWESOME)

Jennifer Meyer (but in gold)

More jewellery! But this time, I'm looking for some fuck-off amazing statement pieces that you don't have to wear with anything else.

YSL

Erickson Beamon

Erickson Beamon

McQueen

Mcqueen

MCQUEEEEEN!

New officey type things. Read: a nice desk, more book shelves (reeaally running out of space to put all my books and stacking them on top of my headboard over my bed is getting very dangerous), a new comfy desk chair (the current one has had it), and a laptop. I swear, if this room that I am sitting in right now was more aesthetically pleasing, I bet I would write soooo much more. Which, by the way, I really need to be doing. And that includes this blog. I'm sorry I've sort of abandoned you for so long. More blogging is underway, I promise.

Things I do not need more of:
- Books. I have about 20 brand new books sitting on my shelves/headboard that I have yet to read since buying them over the last few years. I am also already getting some for Christmas. I'm set for books right now, thanks.
- Chocolates. I love working with kids because you get awesome presents, but really, that's enough chocolate. I should not be eating this stuff.
- Movie vouchers. Lucky me, I also received some movie vouchers from some awesome kiddies, so I'm set for these too. Yay.
- Candles. I love them, I do, but what with all the Diptyque ones I bought in New York and the few I've received from work people, I'm good now. This room smells great, even if it's blah.


Have a lovely holiday x

a top-up

Apart from the general amazing beautiful-ness of New York, there are some very specific items NYC has to offer that make me desperate to return.

I'm talking, of course, about beauty products. Sweet mercy, being in Sydney and going shopping has become SUCH a depressing past-time. Even applying makeup is sad sad sad because I'm constantly stressing that all my fave prods are about to run out. And when they do, I don't know if I can afford to replace them or if they're even available here. New York, HLA, Zoe Foster (for all your recs throughout the Primped site) I curse you for making me addicted to the good shit. And by that I mean moisturiser.

 This is quite possibly my most favouritest product in ever. Clinique lid smoothies are cream eye shadows and they are awesome. I got this shade, 'Cashew Later' which is a lot lighter than it appears in the pic and I use it every single day. I also have a conniption every single day coz I never want it to end. It is sheer, it is shimmery and it acts as a perfect base for every single powder colour you can imagine as well as being positively delightful and all brightening-y all by itself (with some mascara). Magic product. However. While I purchased this in the US for $14.50 it retails in Australia for $42. Fucking hell.

 Laura Mercier product #1 that has changed my life: Secret Concealer. I had a moment when I was first using this revelatory product where I was all "ooh so that's what they mean when they say you should use a concealer that matches your actual skintone so you don't get scary white panda eyes that you thought concealer did which is why you never wore it" (they = everybody at Primped.com.au, ever). In short, a creamy, true-to-your-skintone concealer is a hugely important thing to own (for the delicate under-eye area, after your foundation, which, incidentally you need a lot less of if you use it conjunction with a good concealer - everybody wins).

 Benefit's Posietint was on the wishlist for a while but could not face the thought of paying Australian moneyz on it ($53, compared with $23 US dollars), and strawberrynet does not always have a great range of Benefit products. Finally bought it at Sephora and it's as delightfully pretty as I hoped. But even better. I mainly use stains on my cheeks but this is one is such a soft, nice colour it looks really natural on the lips. This + Burt's Bees tinted lip balm in Pink Blossom is a lovely everyday look. Don't forget to apply this on your cheeks too. YOU LOOK PRETTY BABIN'. N.B. This is not a nail polish. Please don't try and put this on your nails (Huna).

 Another concealer?! Yep. A slightly waxier, less creamy one for blemishes (read: pimples and scars and such). Rub it on your finger a bit first and then voila, the perfect cover-up for face nasties (remember after foundation. I know, shocking).

 Oh hey, look, Cha Cha tint. A lot like Posietint but in a very summery, trendy, coral-orange shade. If you find stains too drying on your lips, this + NARS' Love Devotion sheer coral lippy works a treat.

 Laura Mercier product #2 that has also changed my life: Tinted Moisturiser. I hate tinted moisturiser. I find it makes you look greasy, provides no real coverage, looks greasy, does nothing and makes you look really, super greasy (Invisible Zinc, I'm looking at you). This one does not do that. This amazing stuff does not make you look greasy at all but instead leaves you looking all divine and slightly dewy and even provides pretty good coverage (nothing too hardcore though, this is not a full-coverage foundation). It's pretty great though if your skin is in semi-decent shape. Couple it with some concealer, and your summer makeup is covered.

I feel particularly sad writing about this running out, because I'm sure the day is coming soon. You see, because I was such a loyal customer at Sephora (read: spent a shittonne of money there on my FIRST DAY in NYC), I received a great free gift. This gift was a Laura Mercier mini sampler pack, which included this. I'm too scared to see how much a full-size tube costs in Australia. Probably a bazillion dollars.

Thank GOD I bought this on HLA's recommendation. After buying a tub to return home to her, I got one for myself as well and it's a good thing I did because the other moisturiser I bought for myself as my main day one made me break out (Estee Lauder's Dayware...not hypo-allergenic...stupid, stupid Aph) I have been using this for the past few days and learning to love myself again. This stuff has actually helped clear up the epic pimples I had last week (thanks to the OTHER moisturiser I was using) as well as rehydrating my skin. Now, if it was SPF too, this would be the perfect face product. Girls with sensitive skin, this one is for you.

 Benefit Watts Up. At $30 (US) this was like one of the most expensive makeup products I bought in NY (I know. I know.) and it almost didn't happen. One of my final purchases, this baby just made it to Oz by the skin of it's teeth and I'm glad it did. I've previously only ever used liquid highlighters (Moon Beam, High Beam, NP Set's Liquid Veil) and powders (Bobbi Brown's Shimmer Bricks) but this stick highlighter is fabulous. I'm pretty much using it every single day. It makes you glowy (but not glittery shimmery), it's golden (but disappears into the skin leaving no specific 'colour' behind), and it's easily blendable (but doesn't make streaks in your foundation). Also, this one easily goes in my bag without the terror of possibly leaking everywhere. Yay!

 Bobbi Brown Retro Pink cream lipstick. This looks like a really bright candy pink but it isn't. It's more soft and sheer than it looks while still giving a nice bubblegum-y sheen to your lips. I'm not sure how else to describe it. It's incredibly flattering though.

 Sigh. Another Laura Mercier sampler I received. These 'Eye Basics' are incredible. The one I received was 'Wheat' and it is hands-down the best eye primer I have ever used. If you get creases in your eye makeup, or your eyelids are oily, or whatever, using this before you apply eye makeup cancels all that out. It's kind of amazing. Also, as you choose one that matches your skin tone, it also acts as a concealer as it conceals redness/capillaries/veins and creates a uniform base for all your eye prods! Genius! I'm obsessed! I use this every day too! (with the Clinique lid smoothie). Must must must purchase this as soon as I run out, some way, somehow.

 Laura Mercier product that has changed my life #89347608370673: Metallic Creme Eye Colour in 'Alloy' a delightful silvery, charcoaly, granitey, sort of mauvey tone. For the easiest smoky eye in ever, apply this + press on any of the above sort of colours in a powder form, add mascara and you're done. Too easy. Makes it look like you've done heaps more work than you have too. Love.

NARS illuminator in 'Orgasm'. Illuminators aren't usually coloured, they just sort of make you glow, but this one gives a nice sheer wash of colour too. Used in conjunction with the 'Orgasm' blush (which I also purchased) and you look beautiful and also like you've been having a really, really good time.

 Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Eye stuff. Previously have been surviving off free tiny samples of this, so I figured it was about time. Also, you know, so much cheaper in America. Der. Everybody knows this is great.

 Estee Lauder Idealist Pore Minimising Skin Refinisher. I'm kicking myself for only buying the small bottle of this, because it's divine. Minimises pores, smells really nice and makes your skin feel like a baby's butt when you wake up after your relaxing 8 hours  of beauty sleep (or 3, and then you're up for work, whatever).

 Advanced Night Repair Serum! I am so happy to finally have you in my life in a giant, proper bottle and not a teeny sample! You are just as great as I remember! I love youuu! Let's get married??? But only if you miraculously become cheaper in Australia so I can buy you again D:

Stila 'crush'es (lip and cheek stain). I only got the Mango one...I wish I got them all. Such a beautiful stain. It is not very drying, goes on easily (gives you a chance to blend before it stains) and lasts all day. I want more. It's also...I hesitate to write 'shimmery' but I'm not sure how else to describe it...it's not like shimmery glittery but it has more of a depth of colour than other stains...it's more dimensional...does that make sense? It's not just a regular matte stain. Much more complex.

And now, products I've purchased that are nowhere near running out but are super rad that you should heaps get too if you're a) In NY or b) Rich:

 Ok, so you don't have to be rich to buy Kiehl's, but I got this for 8 bucks. Just sayin'.

Please note: white eyeliner is NOT flattering on anybody and does not effectively counterract redness. You need something more flattering and fleshy-toned like this baby. I would look soooo much worse at work every morning at 7am if I didn't own this. So to my work buddies, you're welcome.

 One of the best eye palettes I have ever purchased (I believe this is called 'taupe no.6') and I use it almost every day also. Dab a bit of the 2nd or 3rd lightest taupes on top of some cream shadow for a bright wide-awake look, or create a flawless smoky eye with the whole thing. Whatever. So gorgeous. Buy something similar if you can (or buy the actual thing, lucky Americans, and Europeans and everybody who is not Australia and severely lacking in Sephoras).

 Bobbi Brown Pot Rouge in 'Cabo Coral'. I know, I'm still banging on about coral. By all means, get a pink one if you want, but I'm just putting it out there: peachy pinky coral apricot-y colours look good on pretty much everyone and work well with all those different shades of makeup. So. Yes. Consider it will you?

 LAURA MERCIER I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, I'M SORRY I DIDN'T REALISE EARLIER. FORGIVE ME. LET'S BE FRIENDS. YOU ARE SO PRETTY. This is the other contender for possibly greatest makeup palette ever. I believe it is called 'Book of Nudes'? It comes in a fancy pants snakesin (faux) cover too. Everyone suits nudes. Duh. This set is great for creating everyday daytime looks, smoky eye, in between, anything, anywhere, ever. You also get a cream bronzer, pinky coral cream blush (because, like nudes, it suits everyone, SEE?) and a cream highlighter. IT IS PERFECT.  Get it. If you can. It cost me $48 American and it was worth every penny. Also because in Australia you might need to re-mortgage your house or forego a couple months' rent to get it. I know I sound like I'm exaggerating but seriously, Australian shopping sucks ass. I'm sorry, but it's true.

Quick list of things I didn't buy that I hate myself for not buying

- Sneakers. OHMIGOD that was one of the most important things I was supposed to get! Sacrificed these so I would save room in my luggage but really regretting it now. Ugh, can't believe I have to look for shoes here now, I mean, why even bother?
- More MAC brushes. I bought one ($17!!!!!!) and stupidly didn't think to get anymore. Then I got home and remembered some of them retail for $72 here, promptly kicked self.
- Another oversize silky black Topshop t-shirt aka the most perfect shirt in the history of the world. DUMB APH.
- More Revlon 'Just Bitten' textas (stains). I bought one ('Flame') and realised it was pretty great and that I got it for like 9 bucks and just...ugh. So silly. This thing is really like a giant texta and goes on like a stain. Which means it gives wicked lip definition without the use of pesky lipliner and keeps whatever you put on top + strong colour, in place. It is pretty drying though so I would definitely use something on top. Lip balm, NARS Love Devotion (no problems with this by the way, I bought 3 tubes), gloss, whatever. It'll stay. I want a pink one.
- MAC Pigments. Honestly, I'm giving myself a headache. HOW CAN I BE SO DUMB? I have 'Mauvement' which I love and yet I stupidly did not purchase any other colours in America. Like, really.

Also, I know, firstworldproblemsfirstworldproblemsfirstworldproblemsfirstworldproblemsfirstworldprob...

P.S. I keep having dreams where I'm in all these random places around the city (some I haven't even been to) and it doesn't help that seemingly every book I've picked up lately is set in the Big Apple. Columbus Ave, SoHo and Bleecker St are all frequent spots I've found myself in the middle of the night. This makes me so sad when I wake up and I realise I'm in lameshits CONCORD and there is nothing that cool and fun and pretty near me for like 10,000 miles (this is obviously a lie - Sydney is beautiful, but still). I am desperate to go back.

P.P.S. Also, I went to Eminem's concert on Friday (AMAZING) and I felt so, so, so sad when it was over. I want him to come back already. He was so intense and like, lucid, he gave me chills. Lucky I bought Kanye tickets that day too (Gold Standing Section) or I would be in the foetal position crying for Marshall. Still.

Phew. I should blog more often so I don't have to regurgitate so much at one time. If you read all that, congratulations, you have more time to waste than me. I love you. You look nice today x